My new years resolution and i intend to keep it!

This will ultimately be a copy of what i write in my journal i have to write it out on pen and paper even having this blog because well that's just how i am lol. anyway i started the journal yesterday and thought about the blog thing all day before i decided to commit to it. i have always been a journal er a writer of sorts i suppose but this is the first time i decided to do a whole blog. the way i see it this will keep me a little more motivated because hopefully i will have readers and they will keep me on track through some strange sense of responsibility i will have toward them. so here i begin this blog with the journal entry for day one.
January 01, 2010.
this is the beginning of a new year. how exciting! never before have i have i made a new year's resolution that i that i really meant to do, but this year is different. this year i am not only making one resolution but Four. the first of which is start setting attainable goals for myself. the second will be easy it is to journal and blog daily it might seem frivilous but it's akin to my third and that is to exercise greater emotional self-control. If there's one thing no one ever forgets about me it's my temper and i hate that! and number four is by far the most important and that is to be more proactive.
anyway of the first (to set goals) i am starting with a list. the goals i have for this year are primarily about creating healthier habits both physical and emotional. and habits are formed by doing something daily for at least six weeks (this is a rough estimate of course. so i am going to come up with 8-9 healthy habits. the plan is to incorporate a new goal every six weeks. what i am hoping to accomplish is a greater feeling of self-worth, success and emotional balance. I'm not good at doing healthy things so i will of course start slow and work my way up. maybe by the time next year rolls around i will have done all the things on my list. (dear God, help me! I've commited to doing something i can not do on my own!" So enough chatter for the moment on to my list:
1. positive affirmations daily to journaled along with five reasons to be thankful I'm alive. and something nice about at least three of the people who have irritated me that day. to start jan 1
2. Take walks and not just to the car but at least around the block. to start feb 12
3. take my vitamins and eat raw veggies or at least drink V8 everyday. (i know it sounds stupids but i never eat veggies and always forget my vitamins lol) to start march 26
4. talk to someone i don't know even i just compliment them and say something like 'good morning' (it's a social thing really, i'm so shy and i never say nice to things to strangers even tho they always compliment me)to start may 7
5. use the STAR method ( that is stop think and relax) before reacting to irritants. to start june 18
6. Tell at least one person something nice i journaled about them especially if it's someone i'm annoyed with. to start july 30
7. volunteer to help a classmate or co-worker w/out asking anything in return.
to start sep 10
8. Write a thank you and send or deliver it everyday. to start oct 22
9. i don't have one yet but maybe with some thought i will come up with one by the day its time to start on dec 3.
10. December 31, 2010 i will reread my journal and see if i have completed all my goals. some are going to be easy like journaling and others will be extremely hard like STAR. some seem small and insignificant but i am certain they are going to change my life.
as i said before the single most important thing i will do this year is:Be more proactive!
millions of people make resolutions and 90% of them give up. i will not, i will look at this like it is a matter of life and death and it is certainly a matter of life. no matter how small things may seem to me i know that they can be a big deal to other people. A positive attitude toward life will take farther than my dreams. i am worth every bit of effort it takes and so is my life. if i want better life i have to make my life better. School is a start but all the little things will impact it to a huge degree. i must dig in and start climbing up pit of this hole that is my depression and choose JOY, PEACE, LOVE and HAPPINESS. this new year is my new beginning. this year i will rock and only good things will come my way because this year i am banishing negativity and despair. this year i refuse to let the enemy take me down. (dear God, don't let me forget this promise to myself. let me live my life with no regrets and only lessons learned/ And God help me! i can do a lot but w/out you and my faith i can do nothing!"
So begins the journey today i start on goal number one affirmations and thankfulness. to day i tell myself i am beautiful and strong and healthy. iam success and everyday i am shedding physical and emotional baggage that slows me down. i am capable, i am dependable, i am honest, i am patient, i am kind,and to day i am good enough for me. Today i have five reasons to be thankful im alive: i have my health, i have my son, i have my home, i am warm and dry, and i am well fed. as for three people who have annoyed...DON (probably daily) his one good for today is that he supports me even if he does annoy the heck outta me and i Can hardly stand to be around him. John is three but he tends to aggravate me his good thong for the day is that he has the most wonderful manners i have ever seen on a three year old. and the third person who annoyed me today was the guy who ran my kid over with the shopping cart his good thing uh well had a nice car and his wife was pretty. that seems so stupid and superficial but i dont know the guy and i felt like i had to say something nice because he annoyed me so badly.
so that's it for the first part of my journal let me give my hands a break and i will come back and write some more. i still have the rest of the journal from yesterday and another one for today lol. hope this isn't too boring for anyone reading it.